Discovering Misophonia
My earliest memories of absolutely hating certain sounds (and movements—yes, this is misokinesia) started when I was around 7 years old. Over the years, more and more triggers cropped up that I would hate deep within my soul, but I had no idea this had a name.
It wasn’t until my late 20s that I discovered my ‘annoyance’ had a name—Misophonia. My now husband and I were out with friends at a bar when I was triggered by a man at the table behind us, who was using chopsticks like drumsticks on the table. I couldn’t help myself—I kept shooting him fiery, death-stares. One of the girls at our table, a complete stranger to me, turned to me and casually said, “You have misophonia!”
I had never heard the word before, and I hadn’t met this girl before that day. She was dating one of my friends, and this was the first time we’d met. But those simple words—wow, did they change my life. She’d named the condition that had been silently sabotaging my life and the lives of those around me for years.
She went on to explain that she was a hypnotherapist and gave me a quick rundown on misophonia. I. Was. SHOOK! To think that I had been living with this from such an early age and had only just discovered it was an actual thing, with a name and all—over 20 years later—was mind-blowing. The fact that I had lived so long without knowing the name for something so detrimental to my life was nothing short of eye-opening.
From that moment on, I dove headfirst into learning everything I could about misophonia. What is it? What causes it? How can I get rid of it? How common is it? Every question I could think of. Now, almost a decade later, I’m still deep in that rabbit hole, because bit by bit, more research is coming to light. And I’ve got this innate need to know everything about this mysterious, lesser-known condition that continues to plague my life.
As I write this, I’ve got around 15 triggers, most of which are unavoidable, everyday noises. And the list is growing. What is alarming is that I continue to find myself triggered by things that never used to bother me, new triggers. Honestly? It’s downright terrifying. It impacts my life—and the lives of those close to me—every. Single. Day.
I never saw that girl again. I have no idea what her name was. But I’d love to thank her for those simple words, “You have misophonia!” Because they changed my life, gave me the chance to learn, and opened the door to finding some much-needed quiet in the chaos.